मेरा जीवन मेरी बातें....... अब कहने को बहुत कुछ है... जीवन भी इतना लंबा गुज़ार चुका हू अब तक, पर आप बस उतना ही जाने जितना आप एंजोय कर सके और कुछ उपयोगी, सोचने योग्य तथ्य.
Here Few interesting Moments of my life and some valuable stuff for you all...
Link to My Channel : -
www.youtube.com/channel/UCcUICQLOicH9BB05GD9-5vQ?sub_confirmation=1
Tuesday, July 19, 2011
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
Tintumon - Funny............................. :)
Dad: Do u know how 2 swim?
Tintumon: No.
Dad: A dog is better than u! It can swim.
Tintumon: So do u know how 2 swim?
Dad: For sure!
Tintumon: Then, what's the difference between u and a dog?
Tintumon called FM radio & said
"I've found a purse with Rs.15000/- a credit card & an ID card of Mr.Mani, No.13,Halls rd,kannur….
Radio jocky : How honest ….so you want to return his purse…?
Tintumon : no……. i just wanted to dedicate a sad song for him…
Father and tintumon were standing in front of the tiger's cage at the zoo.
The father was explaining how ferocious and strong tigers are, and tintumon was taking it all in with a serious expression.
"Dad," tinumon said finally, "if the tiger got out of his cage and ate you up …"
"Yes, son?" the father said expectantly.
"What bus should I take home?" Tintumon finished.
Tintumon was asked to write a sign board for the traffic near the school.
He wrote"Drive carefully! Don't kill the students, wait for the teachers"
Prof.: Chemical symbol of Barium?
Tintumon:BA
Prof.: For Sodium?
Tintumon:NA
Prof.: What will we get if 1 atom of Barium & 2 atoms of Sodium combines?
Tintumon:"BANANA"
The principal was annoyed by the noise during the assembly program.
"There seem to be several idiots in the auditorium this morning,Wouldn't it be better to hear one at a time?"
Tintumon shouted, "Okay – you start."
Teacher: Imagine u r a millionaire. Write ur life history.
Tintumon didn't write.
Teacher: why are you not writing?
Tintumon : I'm waiting 4 my secretary 2 take notes….
PASSIVE VOICE
teacher: Write the passive voice of " I made a mistake"
Tintumon: " I was made by a mistake"
PROFESSOR
A professor to tintumon: "what is attention deficit hyperactive disorder?"
Tintumon: "JIMBALAKDI PAMBA"
professor: "I don't understand anything"
Tintumon: "same 2 you"
PTA Meeting
Tintumon: Dad, there is a small PTA meeting at school tomorrow…..
Dad: Wat do u mean by a small PTA meeting ?
Tintumon: its… just u, me & the Principal !
Techy Tintumon
Teacher: Write a C program to prevent TITANIC from sinking..
Tintumon:Declare the variable TITANIC as float…!
A day spent without laughter is a day wasted. J
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
Monday, June 27, 2011
Marriage... Hilarious :-)
I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry.
That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.
David Bissonette
When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
Sacha Guitry
By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.
Socrates
Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.
Dumas
The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want?
Sigmund Freud
I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.
Anonymous
"Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays."
Henry Youngman
"I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years."
Sam Kinison
"There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage."
James Holt McGavran
"I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me and the second one didn't."
Patrick Murray
Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming
1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it,
2. Whenever you're right, shut up.
Nash
The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once...
Anonymous
My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
Rodney Dangerfield
A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
Milton Berle
Marriage is the only war where one sleeps with the enemy.
Anonymous
A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Wife wanted". Next day he
received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."
Anonymous
First Guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!" Second Guy "You're lucky, mine's still alive."
That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.
David Bissonette
When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
Sacha Guitry
By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.
Socrates
Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.
Dumas
The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want?
Sigmund Freud
I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.
Anonymous
"Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays."
Henry Youngman
"I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years."
Sam Kinison
"There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage."
James Holt McGavran
"I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me and the second one didn't."
Patrick Murray
Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming
1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it,
2. Whenever you're right, shut up.
Nash
The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once...
Anonymous
My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
Rodney Dangerfield
A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
Milton Berle
Marriage is the only war where one sleeps with the enemy.
Anonymous
A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Wife wanted". Next day he
received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."
Anonymous
First Guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!" Second Guy "You're lucky, mine's still alive."
Monday, May 23, 2011
PATI AUR PATNI (Nothing intensional)..just to refersh
1. Apni Biwi ko apni 100% kamai dene se 10% Sukh milta hai.
Kisi doosri ko apni kamai ka 10% dene pe 100% sukh milta hai
... Paisa apka ... Faisla apka ...
2. " Funny but true fact !! A woman worries about her future till she gets a husband, A man never worries about his future until he gets a wife !! .. What do u say?
3. A Man before marriage is - Superman. After Marriage - Gentleman. 5years later - Watchman. 10 Years later - Apne Hi Jaal Mein fasaa hua Spiderman.
4. Life meine hamesha Haste raho,muskrate raho, gaate raho, gungunate raho... taki tumhe dekh kar hi log samaj jaye k tum... " UNMARRIED" ho.
5. Wife:1 baat bolu par mujhe maarna nahi
Hsbnd:Bolo
Wife:Mai Pregnant hu
Hsbnd:Its Gud news,dar kyo rahi thi
Wife:Shadi ke pehle papa ko bataya tha, badi maar pari thi.
6. Wife- agar main kho gayi to tum kya karoge?
Husband - main TV aur newspaper mein Ad dunga ki jaha kahin bhi ho.....
KHUSH RAHO
7. Wife-Shadi ki raat tum ne jab mera ghunghat uthaya to kaisi lagti thi..
Husband- Mai to mar hi jata agar mujhe hanuman chalisa na yaad hoti..!!
8. Why love marriage is better dan Arranged???? B'coz a "KNOWN DEVIL" is better dan an "UNKNOWN GHOST".
9. Wife: main tumhari yaad mein 2O din mein hi aadhi ho gayi hoon, mujhe lene kab aa rahe ho? HUSBAND: 2O din aur ruk jaao.
10. A man gave an add in Matrimonial column
"PATNI CHAHIYE"
He got 1000 replies all saying:-
" Meri Le Ja...!"
''Meri Le Ja...!''
11. Husband to Hotel Manager: "Jaldi chalo! meri biwi khidki se kud kar jaan dena chahti hai"
Manager: "What can I do?
Husband"Kamine, khidki nahi khul rahi hai."
12. Every person is a FREEDOM FIGHTER ........
Immediately after Marriage !!
JAI HIND!!
13. Telling a lie is a
fault for a little boy,
an art for a lover,
an accomplishment for a bachelor and
a Matter of Survival for a married man.
Gud Luck!
14. Woh kahte hain ki hamari biwi swarg ki Apsara hai,
hum ne kaha khushnaseeb ho bhai,
hamari to abhi Jinda hai...
ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
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